The worst of the series.
X-Men: Apocalypse
Grade: C-
Director: Bryan Singer (The Usual Suspects)
Screenplay: Simon Kinberg (Mr. and Mrs. Smith)
Cast: James McAvoy (The Last King of Scotland), Michael Fassbender (Steve Jobs)
Rating: PG-13
Runtime: 144 min.
by John DeSando
“I've been called many things over many lifetimes: Ra, Krishna, and Yahweh. I was there to spark and fan the flame of man's awakening, to spin the wheel of civilization.”Apocalypse (Oscar Isaac)
Yep, we’re in trouble as you can tell from that quote. Sounds almost like a power-deluded presidential candidate. I would call X-Men: Apocalypse “absurd,” but even that dramatic genre has an element of believability, such as waiting for a god that never shows. Waiting for Apocalypse produces only a doomed demi-god from very ancient Egypt, visiting the 1980's and taking over the world.
Besides the usual Hollywood fire and brimstone, this hot mess has no redeeming conceit, such as a race of mothers nursing humanity to evil. I can't tell you the special circumstance other than weeping over Apocalypse because the great actor underneath is so hidden he could be a reality TV host firing everyone who doesn't agree with him.
Except for Jennifer Lawrence's Mystique in a very skin-tight costume, even the CGI is ugly, disguised under tons of smashing rocks, rocks all over, nowhere near aesthetically inspiring.
The crew of X-Men is pretty much dealing with two men, the aforementioned Apocalypse and the estranged Magneto (Michael Fassbender). As in the case of James McAvoy as Xavier and Fassbender, these two superb actors pale next to Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen, possibly because those Shakespearean Brits brought so much gravity from so many years of living. No fault of the younger actors, who are given scant smart dialogue that abounded, for instance, in the anti-heroic Deadpool.
Other marvels such as The Avengers do quite well in the character and wisecracking categories; the X men are humorless except for some attempts from younger heroes like Nightcrawler (Kodi Smitt-McPhee) and Quicksilver (Evan Peters), e.g., “No matter how fast I run, I always seem to be too late.”
A bright note is the thematic capstone declaring the key to human success, companionship:
“It's over, Charles. You are beaten.” (Apocalypse)
“You'll never win.” (Xavier)
“Why not?” (Apocalypse)
“Because you are alone . . . and I am not.” (Xavier)
John DeSando, a Los Angeles Press Club first-place winner for National Entertainment Journalism, hosts WCBE’s It’s Movie Time and co-hosts Cinema Classics. Contact him at JDeSando@Columbus.rr.com
